The Great Gospel of John
Volume 4
Jesus' Precepts and Deeds through His Three Years of Teaching
Jesus near Caesarea Philippi (cont.)
- Chapter 176 -
The individual becoming one with God. Simon's confession of his carnal weaknesses.
1
(Simon:) "I can see now that You, O Lord, are revealing Yourself to the people completely and nowhere You are holding back or keep any secrets like the old Prophets have done, who revealed You to the people only under cover of the thickest veil and nearly showed only the hemline of Your dress to the mortals. Indeed, they founded a religion and a church; but what religion and church was this? Religion was a nearly invisible star, sending a most sparing ray of hope from somewhere of infinite space to earth covered in the thickest night, and the church, a building of hard rocks, a temple, surrounded by many labyrinths and gloomy forecourts, which the people could enter, but never the innermost of the temple, where all the great secrets of life are lying revealed on the golden tables.
2
However here, not only the innermost of the temple is made completely accessible to the people, but also God, the everlasting Inaccessible, totally reveals Himself personally to the people, as He was, is and will be forever. Therefore it is also necessary, to accept God not only partially, but entirely with body, soul and spirit, by the exclusive sole love for Him. Such obligingness like this of the Creator towards the created, therefore also this from the created towards the Creator, must finally result in the full identification between the creative primordial Being and the created after-being.
3
God becomes one with us, and we become one with Him, without the slightest limitation of our personal individuality and the most perfect freedom of will! Since without the most perfect identification of the created with the Creator, a most perfect freedom of will is unthinkable, because only the will of the Creator can be present in the most perfect unlimitedness and the will of the created only then, if it has perfectly become one with the will of the Creator.
4
If we want what the Lord wants, our will is perfectly free, because also the Lord's will is perfectly free; but if we does not want this or only partially, we are the most wretched slaves of our own blindness. Only in God can we become perfectly free; except for God there exists only judgement and death!
5
Lord, You see that I does not fear to speak; and I believe that also this time I have hit the nail on the head! However, add Your almighty blessing to it, that this most marvellous wheat grain, which You Yourself, o holiest Father, have planted from Your everlasting heaven here on this unfortunately very meagre earth, in the earth of our still stupid hearts, so that it can produce thousandfold fruits! O holiest Father, become one with us, Your creatures, with Your still poor children, so that we one day, resembling You, also can become one with You!" - Here Simon, completely captivated, breaks out in tears.
6
But I get up and say to Simon: "Come to Me, you My dearest brother, and hug in Me not Your Creator, but your Brother, so that you are the first one to become one with Me!"
7
Says Simon quite contritely: "O You too holy Father! This mercy the sinful Simon is not worthy of forever!" And he cries again. In return, however, I go to him and press him with a repeated brother's greet to My heart.
8
After a while, when Simon recovered from his captivation and I reassuringly influenced his heart, Simon said: "My Lord and My God! What did I do, that You suddenly are so lenient and merciful towards me? See, I'm a sinful person; since my flesh is quite loose. The beautiful and attractive maiden leave a mighty impression on me, and from time to time quite indecent thoughts are forcing themselves upon me. And quite often I willingly engage with a kind of lust and joy in these thoughts, although not in deed because of a lack of opportunity, but still in my heart, which behaves quite affirmative during such estrous stages.
9
But then also quite bright moments appear in me and I have reasonable views and considerations about this point; but to what use? If I again see a beautiful maiden, all the brighter moments, all the reasonable views and considerations are gone in an instant, and the old scapegoat, armed with all its indecent intentions, is back in its place. Of course, I do nothing; but this doing-nothing is nevertheless not a true doing-nothing, but simply a doing which is prevented by a bad opportunity. The fear for temporary punishment and disgrace is preventing one thereof, but not so the own free will, who at such opportunities contains a lot of desire, and at a good opportunity surely will not reveal any negation! I know my loose flesh unfortunately just too well and therefore are a sinful person and not worthy of such a great mercy from You."